Although, I would accidentally sleep in a lot I finally managed three consecutive sundays. I was very excited to have my own bible. But that is not the point of this story.
When I was nine I moved in with my grandparent's who were Mormons. With my step-grandmother I attended The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. I was forbidden from seeing my mother because she was gay and gay was a sin.
After returning to live with my biological father I quit attending the little church up the road. At this point I no longer attended any church. And to be honest I didn't really want to. I attempted to read the bible. But it was confusing, depressing, and large. So I stopped. I did however keep a tiny marble statue of Mary that a catholic friend gave to me. She told me I needed it.
At twelve years old I moved in with my mother. By this time I didn't attend church, I only believed that parts of the bible true, and I wasn't very religious at all. But then I started praying with my mother every night. It's a tradition we continue to this day.
At age fourteen I attended a baptist church for what was the second time in my life. I didn't wear a dress. (This would have been next to sin in a Mormon church.) I wore pants. I told my mom what they preached about at church and she told me I wasn't going back.
So from fourteen to eighteen, I refused to have anything to do with religion except for praying with Mom. I refused to read the bible because it bothered me so much, and I didn't attend any churches because I realized that all the churches just wanted one thing. (the same thing) To prove that they were the only true denomination.
At eighteen (the age I am now) I realized that I couldn't really call my self a christian. I prayed in Jesus' name, sure. But I didn't believe in the bible any more. So I decided, Christianity obviously isn't right for me. So I'm going to find MY religion.
The first religion I investigated was Hinduism. It's a nice religion although, a little on the confusing side if you aren't/don't know any Hindu people. Some people even told me that I was not allowed to become a Hindu because "You must be born into the religion."
Although, I think this person may have been mistaken. You must be born into their race but I've heard of people converting to their religion. I think this concept is similar to Judaism. (You can't convert to Jewish race but you can convert to Jewish religion.)
Part of what got me interested in Hindu was one of those What Religion Should You Be? quizzes. I took the quiz and Hindu come up at the top with Paganism and Buddhism. So I began my research.
I researched other books as well. Life after death books. And after reading all of these books I had come to a belief system. One that isn't like most religions out there. I wasn't really sure until I was talking to my big brother the other day.
I said, " Look, here's the way I believe. I believe that there's no hell and there's only one ultimate god. Although, God can take other forms as well. I believe that when we die we go to Heaven. (Well, maybe not Heaven exactly but that place we go to when we die.) What part of 'heaven' we go to depend on our level of enlightenment that is attained while still on Earth. And that those on higher levels can come down and help those on lower levels."
Alex summed it up for me when he responded, " So basically you mashed all the religions together."
Well, it's like Mom says. There's a grain of truth in everything.
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